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May 09, 2002

Raw transcript of Arafat preparing his speech

Ahem. Ahem. <cough, cough> OK, here goes . . . As President of the Palestine Liberation and the Palestine National Authority, I reiterate my commitment to and sharing with the United States of American and the international community in their fight against <snicker> Ok, hold on I can do this <giggle> . . . ahem . . . cough . . . ok, where was I . . . oh, yeah . . . uh, blah, blah blah, reiterate, blah, blah, blah, ok, in their fight against terror- <explosive laugh> I'm sorry, really, I, I can do this <stifled snicker> <pause> <deep breath> <mumbled> must not laugh, must not laugh. <looking at aid> Ok, let me try it again. Uh, let's start . . . ok, here . . . sharing with the United States of American and the international community in their fight against <barely suppressed snicker> terrorism. I have issued my <snicker> orders to the Palestinian security forces to confront and obstruct any terrorist act <explodes in laughter> <hold hand up> Oh, my, this is just too rich <peals of laughter> There's no way I can get through this with a straight face <uncontrollable laughter> I mean those idiots in the West actually swallow all this garbage, and believe it. <laughter> I mean how gullible can someone be, right? <wiping tears from his eyes> hoo, boy, well I guess I gotta do it. We don't have any choice, bring in the drugs, cause there ain't no way I'm gonna be able to read this with a straight face unless I'm zonked senseless.

Comments

Posted by Jack Lewis at May 9, 2002 04:44 PM